Weddings Redefined

As you may know, we make a donation to charity on the first anniversary of all of our full service wedding clients.  We see this as very integral to our mission to promote marriage equality.  In 2011, we are proud to have donated to the following wonderful nonprofit organizations:

• GLAD
• Freedom to Marry
• Lambda Legal
• The Point Foundation
• HRC

Same-sex marriage has been legal since 2009 but Vermont’s history of LGBT rights goes back to 1993 when it became the first state to create civil unions.   Vermont is one of the least populous states in the country, meaning there are loads of wide open spaces for your country wedding.  

Where to Stay:  Stowe, Vermont is a great choice as a home-base for gay wedding planning in Vermont and you simply cannot beat the luxury of the Stowe Mountain Lodge which not only has stunning accommodations but beautiful wedding backdrops as well.  If you are looking for an even more rural experience, check out the Moose Meadow Lodge, a gay-owned inn and wedding venue.

What to Do:  Vermont is all about the outdoors!  Hiking, canoeing and kayaking, skiing and snowshoeing are just some of the possibilities.  Great farm-to-table dining can be found in restaurants throughout the state.  And don’t forget to check out the tastings at Cabot Cheese and Ben and Jerry’s!

How to Get Married:  Simply apply for a marriage license in a town in the county in which you’ll plan to marry in Vermont.  There is no waiting period, no blood tests and there are no witnesses required.  The fee is $20.

Our Picks for LGBT Photographers:  Kelly from Closed Circle Photo knows everything about Vermont and takes beautiful shots.  We also love the other Kelly, from Kelly Prizel Photography who shoots throughout New England.

Our Picks for an LGBT Florist:  Wildflower Designs in Stowe  does lovely work!

Our Picks for LGBT Officiants:  Greg Trulson (also owner of Moose Meadow Lodge) is openly LGBT.

With some major exceptions, Vermont wedding vendors are very welcoming of same-sex couples so you should have a great experience no matter who you choose. Don't forget about us at 14 Stories if you get stuck and are looking for a hand with all of your gay wedding plans in Vermont!

(photo by Jeanette LeBlanc)

This week in the gay wedding travel guide, it's Provincetown, Massachusetts (aka P-town), the tiny town on the tip of Cape Cod and a hugely popular LGBT tourist destination in the U.S.  

For a tiny town, P-town offers world class dining, great shops and beautiful beaches.  It’s a great place to plan your gay wedding but has very few wedding venues and is most suitable for smaller weddings.  Also, July and August are tough times for weddings in P-town because it's high tourist season and many inns require 5 night stays.

Where to Stay:  Gabriel’s is our pick for women with a great location near the center of town.  The rooms are beautiful with great amenities, including an outdoor hot tub!  For guys and mixed groups, we also love the Carriage House (also with an outdoor hot tub!) and the White Porch Inn.  There are many, many inns in Ptown so you'll easily find a great spot.

What to Do:  Stroll the many boutiques and galleries of Commercial Street.  Check out the Provincetown Art Association and Museum in the East End.  Explore the Pilgrim Monument museum to see what P-town was like when the Pilgrims landed (it’s where the Mayflower Compact was signed).  Hit the beaches by bike, car, cab or bus.  Herring Cove is a more accessible and family-friendly bay beach.  Race Point is a more adult beach on the ocean side.  You can rent bikes and ride the paved trails through the dunes.  Enjoy cabaret and drag shows at night or hit one of the town’s nightclubs.

How to Get Married:  You can apply for your marriage license at Provincetown City Hall for $35 but keep in mind that, in Massachusetts, there’s a 3 day waiting period.  If you are in a rush, you can have that waived by a court order if you drive to Orleans, Massachusetts.  We suggest, however, applying for and picking up your license in Boston instead since the courthouse and City Hall are near each other.  We can help with this process through our Vows package.

Our Picks for LGBT Photographers: John Caplice and Doreen Birsell are fantastic and the photo above was shot by Doreen. 

Our Picks for LGBT-owned Florists: Wildflower of Provincetown is our pick especially for more contemporary designs! 

Our Picks for LGBT Officiants: Rev. James Mack can officiate your religious or non-religious ceremony.

P-town’s wedding vendors are very welcoming of same-sex couples so you should have a great experience no matter who you choose.  Don't forget about us if you get stuck and are looking for a hand with all of your gay wedding plans in Provincetown.

This is the first part in a new series every Monday for the next few weeks. Each week we'll be spotlighting an area where same-sex marriage is legal and providing you with some great travel tips and our picks for top same-sex wedding professionals.

This week, it's New York City, the most popular LGBT tourist destination in the U.S. New York has it all. The world's best shopping and finest restaurants, beautiful green space and tons of venues with spectacular views.  

Where to Stay: Start with Kimpton Hotels (our fave when we travel).  Kimpton properties are known for their gay and dog-friendliness, their evening wine hour and contemporary aesthetics. Our personal favorite is Ink 48, located in the heart of Hell’s Kitchen and featuring a beautiful outdoor terrace. If you’re headed downtown, the Ritz Carlton Battery Park is a stunning option with its amazing views of the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island. The Ritz is the only 5 star hotel in downtown New York. 

What to Do: Where to start?! Stroll the boutiques and galleries of Soho. Walk the High Line. Dig into the wares at Chelsea Market. Sip coffee in the West Village. Check out one of the hundreds of museums. Hit the clubs in Hells Kitchen and Chelsea. Hold hands on a stroll through Central Park. You’ll never get bored. 

How to Get Married: Head down to City Hall in lower Manhattan during normal business hours and spend $35 on a marriage license. It will be valid 24 hours after you receive it and then you can legally married by a licensed officiant. More details are here. 

Our Picks for LGBT Photographers: Kat Hempel and Erica Beckman’s Clean Plate Pictures are fun and fabulous! 

Our Picks for LGBT-owned Florists: Spruce in Chelsea rocks the clean, modern look. Fleurs NYC and Anthony Brownie (both in the Flower District) are our picks for bigger weddings (note: neither have retail space) 

Our Picks for LGBT Officiants: Rev. Louis is an absolute sweetheart. And our own Rev. Andrew is top-notch!

New York's wedding vendors are, by and large, very welcoming of same-sex couples so you should have a great experience no matter who you choose.  Don't forget about us if you get stuck and are looking for a hand with all of your gay wedding plans in New York!

I was speaking to a groom recently who was confused by our statement on our services page that says that we no longer offer "Day of Coordination."  He thought we planned the wedding but didn't actually show up to run it.  

No way.  We're there all the way through for our clients.

But I figured I should probably do some education on Day of Coordination.  It's a wedding industry term so I apologize if the jargon is confusing.  

Most wedding planners offer a service called Day of Coordination or something similar.  In reality, it's more like "Month of Coordination."  Basically the engaged couple plans the wedding themselves and a Day of Coordinator steps in about a month out to visit the venue and understand the flow and design of the wedding.  He or she contacts the wedding vendors to introduce herself and confirm everything.  He or she creates a schedule and then actually sets up and runs the rehearsal and the wedding day.  

14 Stories doesn't actually offer this service.  We used to but stopped a few years back.  I'm a bit too much of a control freak to let someone else plan the weddings we're involved with. 

We do, however, recommend great professionals who do offer Day of Coordination, and in fact, specialize in it...if this is the service you seek, check out our outstanding colleagues below:

• Chicago:  Elevage Events
• Boston:  Esquire Events and Allure Consulting
• New York:  Just About Married
• San Francisco Bay Area:  Allure Consulting

I have many things to be thankful for, and I try really hard to be mindful of that every day, although some days it's easier than others.  I am so grateful for a beautiful, supportive wife, adorable and fun son, and a thriving business in which I get to do much more than plan weddings, but also be an advocate for the LGBT community.  

Our son turned one on Halloween (I can hardly believe it - it seems like he was born yesterday) and is such a joy.  He and Jen make every day beautiful.

We just returned from a family vacation in the Cayman Islands.  We traveled with our dear friends, Brian and Eric, a married gay couple who live in San Diego.  They are in the process of adopting their own child and we know that our future joint family vacations will be full of even more love, joy and pure fun that share together.

For all of these blessings, I am grateful this Thanksgiving and every day.

I just returned from Engage!, a luxury wedding industry summit held twice a year.  This was my fourth Engage! and I always look forward to this time to re-invigorate myself and my business as well as connect with new and old friends.  I've made so many thoughtful and genuine friends at Engage! - we know how to have a good time yet also hold each other accountable for the goals we set.  Engage! is a time for substantial conversations, deepening friendships and new collaborations in what can be a very intense and competitive industry.

Kathryn and Rebecca, the founders of Engage! (and simply wonderful, kind women who have provided me with invaluable business mentorship) always find a way to top themselves and exceed our expectations.  This time, they recruited our friends Heather and Susan from Gifts for the Good Life to completely brand all of the goodies associated with the event.  Even the chopsticks at the closing party were branded with the Engage! logo.  You know they're good when they impress picky wedding industry talents.

Engage! is also a chance for me to chat with my peers from around the country to hear about their experiences working with same-sex couples (most of them don't get to very often), give advice and answer questions.  I love talking about gay weddings and it's so fun for me to hear the stories from my peers.

To get a sense of this fabulous experience, check out the highlight video from the very talented Elysium Productions below:

engage! 11 Grand Cayman // Part One from Elysium Productions on Vimeo.

engage!11 Grand Cayman // Day 2 & 3 recap film from Elysium Productions on Vimeo.

I have new clients for whom I'm planning a 200+ guest gay wedding on Fire Island in the Pines.  Gay wedding planning on Fire Island requires a mastery of logistics - there are very few resources on the island itself - and most cars (except for the essentials and year-round residents) are not allowed.  We'll have to charter a boat and ship in every table, every chair, light and sound equipment, caterer's equipment, furniture, etc. - but fortunately I have experience with such challenges.

Another consideration for Fire Island is that there are about 700 houses but no real working hotel (yet...there's a small one that is being renovated and promises to be beautifully done and open for 2012).  So, we'll have to reserve a bunch of these houses (many of which are vacation rentals) for wedding guests.  And the only wedding-appropriate structure for a large wedding upwards of 200 guests is Whyte Hall, some photos of which I took below.  Fortunately, Whyte Hall is a fantastic space.

I'm really excited about my new clients and planning a gay wedding in the Fire Island Pines.  Check out the photos below for some inspiration:

the path from the beach to Whyte Hall from the ocean side

Whyte Hall, interior (stage)

Whyte Hall interior

Whyte Hall exterior

Whyte Hall exterior

the ceremony location on the beach

Wedding Pride magazine is a new print magazine that just launched in New York City and I believe it will also be a resource for Fire Island gay wedding planning.   I was honored to have a piece of my book on the same-sex wedding registry excerpted in the magazine, as well as be interviewed for a few other articles.  Check out a couple of the articles here (though I didn't upload the one about bachelor and bachelorette parties) or read the whole issue here.  It's a great resource for gay wedding planning in New York!